Pump Rooms

August 29th, 2008 |

Several of the local hostelries that I frequent for the imbibance of alcoholic beverages have, over recent times, stopped putting out beer mats on their tables and counters.

So it was that at one time the overspill from your pint would be consumed by that 3 1/2 inch square to stop the slops ending up down your tie or shirt front - now you have to ask your purveyor for a mat or seek out a pile in a darkened corner.

Strange? Shortage of cardboard? (could it be the Elfen Safety police?)

Anyway, I was out the other night to find a plethora of heart shaped beermats spread liberally around an inn of some repute that on the face of it told me that “…245 best friends die every day…” eh? I don’t know about you but I don’t have 245 best friends? 2… 4… possibly 5? I turn the thing over to discover that its a blurb from the British Heart Foundation: “I don’t want it to be you. They die because not enough of us know the various symptoms of a heart attack or what to do when they occur.” Probably very true.

Then… then it urges to visit their web site “… and experience what it’s like to have a heart attack.” Experience what it’s like! Call me a wuss but no ta very much. As my companion noted: “If you go there then the monitor you’re using will probably leap off the desk straight into your chest.”

Water Water Everywhere

August 20th, 2008 |

There I was wandering through the online version of the Guardian when I was stuck by a headline and so clicked to read: ‘Revealed: the massive scale of UK’s water consumption’.

The environment group WWF will tell a meeting of international experts in Stockholm that the average British person uses 150 litres of water a day for washing and drinking. 150 litres? In proper money that’s almost 33 gallons!

Quick calculation here of my own usage…

Quick Shower = max 6 gallons; Flush loo about 6 times a day = max 4 gallons; Fill kettle for max 4 cups of tea per day = 1/4 gallon; Wash dishes in sink = 1/2 gallon; …er… the washing machine goes on once a week so that probably uses 8 gallons so that’s a gallon-ish a day. Don’t drink water as fish do things in it. Total 12 Gallons or 60 pints.

Then they point out that I am supposedly using 4,645 litres of ‘virtual water’ every day. WHAT! 1022 gallons extra! A further 8176 pints! To produce the food that I eat.

What a load of tosh.

Got to run as the swimming pool needs filling :)

Diggory Press... are you there?

August 9th, 2008 |

My Albert tomes and the theatre book that I PODed, ‘Operation Brutus’, are still on sale at Amazon and various other sites throughout the interwebthing and to order at shops.

However the company that I POD through, Diggory Press, seem not to want to take on the next tome of ‘Panto’ as I have been trying to contact them for a month to no avail.

Their web site is still there, they seem to be still touting for business - albeit their last published works seem to be back in April - and I’m told by the printer, Lightening Source, that they are still working for them.

Anyone out there able to enlighten me as to the state of play?

(N.B. Yes I do know about the authors that were taking out a court case against them back in Feb/March but there has been no feedback since.)

Yawn...

August 8th, 2008 |

During the 17 days of the 2008 Beijing Olympics, which begin today, the BBC will broadcast over 2,700 hours of TV coverage and many more hours of video output via its red button interactive service and website.

David Gordon, the BBCs head of major events, has said: ‘People are looking to us to inspire the younger generation to achieve in sport, and in a way we’re hoping to cheer the nation up. And all this for 40p a day.’

The young people I’ve spoken to, and some of the older ones, couldn’t give a rats elbow about the Olympics. As for me I’d rather have my 40p a day spent on something more constructive and enlightening for young people - now that would cheer me up.

Booze Delivery

August 1st, 2008 |

We’re all used to the familiar rattle of our letterbox, at some point in the day, as our local postman drops whatever missives, bills or junk mail through our door.

The Royal Mail, however, is cutting back on office branches throughout the country; many of them in rural areas much to the chagrin of many a villager wanting stamps or their pension.

It therefore comes as no surprise that the eleven residents of a hamlet in the Yorkshire Dales, going by the name of Booze, have been told that they will not be getting any of their mail delivered and they will have to collect it from their nearest sorting office which is a 45 minute drive away - Story in the Northern Echo.

The reason for this? “Health and Safety”. Or put another way… the postie has a bad back!