Share Hang The Blacks And Kill The Workers*

May 19th, 2010 |

I was chatting, t’other day, to a former work colleague about our early days in the theatre and what the ‘boys’ have to put up with now. Ah, those heady days of theatre before the stupidity of overly enforced PCness, the raging armies of Elfin Safety got their grubby mits on being sensible and ambulance chasing lawyers.

You were allowed to go for a pie and a pint at lunchtime (but go back drunk and you were sent home) and normally with cast and crew from the visiting show and, I believe, that this gave a good feeling of repartee between the inhousers and the visitors. Gone.

If you wanted to climb up a stepladder you did - if you fell off… well, shouldn’t have overreached, should you. Gone - Working At Height Directive - a pal of mine has just been sent on a 2 day course to teach him about climbing ladders. He’s 54 and been doing it all his life with no mishap.

The time I was told by an official H&S bod that the crew on stage had to wear hard hats whilst the scenery was moving - I informed him that I would let the director and the actors know as well. (berk!)

The days of being able to send an apprentice out for ‘a long stand’ or ‘a short weight’ or ‘the key to the grid’ (no such thing); ‘tartan paint’; sky hooks; a fallopian tube to fix that light… the list went on but now it would ‘breach their human rights’.

Mind you… I did find out you can now buy Sky Hooks - like the ad says ‘…what use are these?’

*”Hang the blacks” is a reference to putting up the black serge cloths that back off many a production and “Kill the workers” means going to the show state whereby working lights are turned off.

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